Fighting Back

I have struggled a little with this post.  I recently viewed a blog that tore down everything that this blog is standing for.  What I really wanted to do was go through and challenge everything that was written.  My problem with doing that was this blog then became contentious, and I would be tearing down another woman which is contrary to why it was created.  My heart broke as I read her thoughts, at first I was defensive and angry, now I feel sorry for her.  As I went through this other blog, it is enough to say that Satan is out in full force trying to diminish what we are doing as mothers, and as women!  It is time to fight back.... we will do this by being the women we were created to be.  We will do this by being the wife, mother, aunt, friend, grandmother, and neighbor that God needs us to be.  

Let's show more love, be more kind, have more fun, laugh a little more and find more joy in our lives.   

When Jewish women bid good-bye to each other they say "Have joy in your children"  This has encouraged me to think.  Sometimes when I am saying bye to a friend it is with a little hesitation about getting back to work taking care of the children, and home; and my farewell sounds a little more like "Wish me luck, I'm going home to the kids"   Am I missing the boat a little?  I think so..... Sister Hinckley said "Have joy in your mothering"    So how do I have joy in my children?  How do I have joy in my mothering?  First of all it's a choice...... I get to choose my attitude towards being a mom and whether or not I am finding joy in my children- and for that matter in my mothering.  I get to choose joy in being the mother, the aunt, the grandma, the neighbor, the friend.  We all have incredible opportunities to do good.  Second, I surround myself with amazing women who can help me see the important things in this life.  So, a big thanks to all of my sisters out there who inspire me to be a little better.  

It occurred to me this week that Eve was called the mother of all living even before she had children.  As I thought about this it seems as though there is more to being a mother than actually delivering a child into this world. You can be a mother to those around you.  There is so much for each of us to do.   As President James E. Faust said: “There is no greater good in all the world than motherhood. The influence of a mother in the lives of herchildren is beyond calculation."  We will make a difference!!! 

This can be done in a lot of different ways.  I have a cute neighbor that decided to create a 4-H club  for her daughter and any other little girls in the neighborhood who would like to participate.  She is amazing.  She is mothering my daughter every time she teaches her a skill and is kind to her, she helps her to become better.  She is fighting back against Satan by loving and teaching these young ladies.  I have told her on several occasions that she is amazing to do this for these little girls. Her reply is always the same... "I like it!"   She finds joy in doing it.  We can all do something.  We can each show love, we can each make a difference in our own ways. 

How do you fight back? 

How do you find joy in your children and in your mothering? 


Today I will choose to not constantly go behind and pick up the mess Olie makes.... instead I will sit down and play with him.  We will see about tomorrow ;) 

Swamp witch or Princess?

What is your identity?

What is your worth?

How do you decided what it is?

What happens when you feel like you have lost your identity, or that you are worthless?

These are interesting questions to think about, because we all know what the "Sunday school" answers are......  I know that I have questioned who I am before and I have at times been very discouraged with what I felt was my identity and my worth.  It is hard to remember who we are all the time, especially when we have Satan and his minions yelling at us that we are nothing.

I read a book several years ago that changed the way I saw the temptations of Satan.  In the book Satan and his minions are on the crest of a hill where they are waiting for morning to come with anticipation.  On this particular day, along with all of the other days, they try to come in and in all ways try to discourage, depress, isolate etc.  As they are waiting to have the humans wake up, Satan tells them to be the very first thought that they have in the morning...... These could include, and have for me at times been "Good morning swamp witch....... Why are you even up this morning?....... You have no friends- Go back to bed!...... You are so fat....... the list could go on and on.  Why doesn't he ever tell me I am a beautiful princess- a daughter of God?  Sometimes it is hard to hear what our Heavenly Father thinks of us, when these devils are silently yelling at me.  Another thing that hit me was the fact that some of the followers of Lucifer are women- there are probably a lot of them.  I don't know why this was such an epiphany to me...... Maybe I thought all devils were men ;)   But of coarse there would be women- and who knows better how to be mean to women; than women?  Isn't it true- sometimes women can be ruthless, and extremely hurtful..... I am sure that "those" women know exactly how to hurt us as women!  They can be really good at making us feel worthless.  Now that I understand where this is coming from, I can say to myself- this is not true, this is not what my Father thinks of me.  I am not good at doing this all the time.  I hope I can get better at hearing the voice of my Father telling me that I am doing good, to just try and do my best- be happy, enjoy life, and have fun... and remember that He loves me.... I am a princess.

I love the quote given by Sheri Dew; "None us us come to this earth to gain our worth; we brought it with us."  We are amazing women with so much to offer to this world!  The Lord needs us to be strong and to stand with Him.  He needs us to understand who we are and what we are capable of.  In studying forordination for a lesson I needed to teach I was excited to again to be reminded of our premortal life.  We are his daughters!  There are specific things that we were sent here to do; none of which was to gain worth.  We could go through and name several men and women who were forordained to come to this earth to do something great...... But so were you!  "Mary and Eve and countless other glorious women as well as countless magnificent men were not assigned to this dispensation.  We were.  It is humbling and a little scary.  But do you think God would have left the last days to chance by sending men and women He couldn't depend on?  There is no chance He would ever be that cavalier or careless." (Sheri Dew)  He knows what we are capable of- do you?

Just as Esther in her day, we were saved for such a time as this!!!

This is our day!  Let's remember that when we hear or think unkind thoughts about ourselves; things that make us want to stay in and not make a difference, and make us feel worthless.... Let's remember who we are, and what we are capable of! I hope that we as sisters can pull together, and remind each other of our true identity and of our individual worth.  Let's remind each other!! Let's do something extraordinary!!!! Try and make a difference today.  

This chick is breaking through

Have Understanding.......


Understanding our purpose here isn't always easy-  Understanding the WHY's?????
I am trying to gain a greater understanding because I get that when I have understanding .... I just might be able to cope better with trials.

 Because I am human- I do sometimes get discouraged when I can't make out my own way, ... where the path I am traveling on..... I can only see a step or two ahead.  Oh, how I wish that sometimes the entire path was lit before me and I knew exactly what was ahead.  If that were the reality, I wouldn't learn to live by faith.  Lessons on faith can be very hard- but it is the hard times that make us stronger - right?

I am reminded of the example of a baby chick..... Neal A. Maxwell said this
" Is not our struggling amid suffering and chastening in a way like the efforts of the baby chicken still in the egg?  It must painfully and patiently make its own way out of the shell.  To help the chick by breaking the egg for it could be to kill it.  Unless is struggles itself to break outside its initial constraints, it may not have the strength to survive thereafter."

He continues to say "Afflictions can soften us and sweeten us, and can be a chastening influence.  We often think of chastening as something being done to punish us, such as by a mortal tutor who is angry and peevish with us.  Divine chastening, however, is a form of learning as it is administered at the hands of a loving Father. "

Understanding that what we are called to go through will make us better and stronger in the end. Understanding that we are not alone, and that we at some premortal time, knew and understood what we would be asked to do- and knowing that we won't have more than we can handle- we can find strength to continue breaking through our individual shells.  Looking through our spiritual eyes can also be helpful in keeping perspective.   Elder Maxwell said "If we think only in the usual ways, we will not understand the unusual experiences through which we must sometimes pass.  But if we can trust God and know that He is there and that He loves us, then we can cope well and endure well".

What are some things you do keep going?

What helps you during difficult times?

Let's keep going..... can you imagine what we will be like when we break free from our shells?!!

NEVER GIVE UP...... KEEP MOVING FORWARD!

Got Talent? YES YOU DO!!

Have you ever had someone ask you to write down what talents you have or what you are good at?  What happens???   I know that sometimes for me, when I am asked something along those lines, little voices pop up in my head that say..... "What are they talking about..... talent?  What talents?"  Then a long list develops in my mind of all the things that others are really talented at, and I am not...... Why does this happen?  I really think that Satan does not want us to find out the secret that we really are powerful, and that if we knew and understood what we were capable of, and if we could recognize the talents that have been given to us-- we could really thwart his plan!  (And really isn't that what we would like to do).

Why is it easy to see others talents and not our own?

Does this ever happen to you???  You feel like you might be good at something, or that you could contribute something to your sphere of influence, but you lack the confidence to do anything about it.  Maybe, you feel like I have at times -- "What difference would it make?   So-and-so could do a much better job at that than I could...... It really wouldn't help anyone" or even "You're not good enough to do that...... What will people think?"  Well........ ENOUGH OF THAT!!!!!

I think sometimes Satan is doing a better job at diverting our attention, and discouraging us from using our talents than he is at getting us to do some great "sin" ---- however, in doing this we are not being all that we can be, and making a difference in our life or in the lives of those we love.

I was watching a show where there were three sisters, the middle sister felt overshadowed by the other two.  To her, they had talents and she was the one that didn't.  She felt that she was somewhat inferior and could never compare.  Then one day her younger sister came to her and she said something that I have actually thought about a lot....  she said "You have a talent none of the rest of us have-- just find out what it is and use it.  It's doing nothing that is the enemy".

It's doing nothing that is the enemy!!!! I find great truth and wisdom in that.  We all have different talents, and strengths.  I am so grateful for all of the amazing women in my life..... My daughters, my mother and mother-in-law, my grandmothers, my sisters, my friends..... and some women that I know from a distance, who all have what seems to me an abundance of talent--- yet, none of them have exactly the same talents.  I hope you will search for what your talents are, and that you will do something with them!!  I am trying to find out more about my own, and trying to do something about it :) 

Our Family Tree

For the last little while, thanks to a couple of friends I have gotten into family history- and it has been really fun for me.  Family history is something that has always intrigued me, and I like to think that for that little bit of time I spend doing research I am an investigator..... :)  I enjoy puzzles and I  like learning stories about my family.  Like the one when a little boy in my family line was carried off by gypsies and his little sister ran to tell his mother.  She of coarse was horrified to find her son missing, and ran to get the local constable.  A few miles out of the town where they lived they caught up to this gypsy caravan to find that the little boy was indeed with them.  His captors had put a blindfold over his eyes with walnut shells covering his eyes- however they had also put beetles in the walnut shells to bite and infect the eyes of this little boy, so he could not recognize his mother when she came.  Weird stuff!

I have another distant relative that was lying in bed on night with his wife, when lightening came in through the window and killed him in his bed.

There have been several stories that I have found out along the way- I have enjoyed finding things out about my family, but it has also been some hard work to find these relatives.  I want to know where I come from, and in doing so I have been excited to learn more about myself.  In this process I have had to go back several generations to find out where I come from.----

The family tree for my spirit is not long at all, in fact I only need to go back to my parents to find out where I come from.  I am a child of God!  When I think about the fact that we are literal daughters of God- - wow!!!  There is a lot of power, and responsibility that comes with that.... It is also very exciting!  We are daughters of GOD!!!  Remembering this is the challenge.......

"Consider the power of the idea taught in our beloved song 'I am a Child of God' ..... Here is the answer to one of life's greatest questions, 'Who am I?'  I am a child of God with a spirit lineage to heavenly parents.  That parentage defines our eternal potential.  That powerful idea is a potent antidepressant.  It can strengthen each of us to make righteous choices and to seek the best that is within us.  Establish in the mind of a person the powerful idea that he or she is a child of God, and you have given self-respect and motivation to move against the problems of life"    -Dallin H. Oaks

So how can we remember our spiritual lineage- and really remember who we are and where we come from??

How can we help each other to remember this important fact?

In the beginning....

 Growing up the only thing that I wanted was to be a wife and a mother.  I thought about being a nurse (which would still be awesome one day) but my number one goal in life was getting married to my own price charming who would come in and sweep me off my feet, and we would have several beautiful, well behaved and completely obedient children.  My life would be a fairy tale come true!  I would be the ever present mother that always woke with a smile and had a warm breakfast ready when everyone woke up, milk and cookies for when the children returned home from school, yellow balloons to hand out to them just for fun.  Somewhere between me singing, and dancing around while cleaning up the home (similar to the scene in Enchanted) I would find time to exercise if  I needed to.  I would always look the part of the beautiful wife completely put together when my husband returned home from work only to find a balanced meal ready to be eaten.   Together we would tuck our perfect little children into bed after we helped them say their prayers and they would be off to dreamland!  Then I woke up......

Here I am pregnant with my seventh child and nineteen years later and I have learned that my "fairy tale" life looks a lot different than the one I had in my mind as a young wife and mother.  I did marry my prince charming, but I found out that marriage is a work in progress!  We actually needed to be a priority to each other, we would need to be forgiving of each other, and I learned that nobody is perfect--- especially not me!  I learned that the mornings when I wake up and have a hot meal ready for the children is usually on a day when no one has school and I have unlimited time in the morning, other than that -- cold cereal.  I do have hot chocolate chip cookies when the children come home from school..... a couple times a year!  Not nearly as often as I had anticipated.  There has not been many yellow balloons, and hardly any singing and dancing as I do the laundry, the endless dishes or vacume the floor.  I found out that I do need to exercise and that it doesn't happen as often as I wish it would.  Most nights Mike is working and our balanced meal..... well I go through times of cooking and times of corn dogs.  By bed time my energy and patience have usually been left somewhere (probably with the rest of my mind) and for the most part alone, I shoo the kids off to bed as quickly as I can so that I can have a second to myself. Before starting my dream life again the next morning :) 

I have learned a very valuable lesson over the years.  I have learned that being a wife and a mother are not always the beautiful painting I had pictured in my mind but that it is exactly what I want to be doing and it is exactly right where I am supposed to be!!!  It is an amazing gift that I have been given and the opportunity of a lifetime!  I have learned that having children and raising them is at times the hardest thing I have had to do and yet it is most rewarding career any woman can have.  I have learned that I am not just raising my children to be good citizens of their community.  It is not just about raising them to be a doctor, lawyer, nurse, teacher etc.  It is about encouraging them to be the best that they can be here on this earth-- but they will be so much more than that. They can become mothers and fathers, they can become like their Heavenly Father one day.  It doesn't end here for them, nor does it end for me.  


January 2014

So..... I wrote the above a couple of years ago and have yet to publish it.  Partly because I am nervous to open up this project that I have felt compelled to start-- for a couple of reasons.  1.  I don't feel like I am an expert in anything, and I don't pretend to know or do all that I want to put out there on this blog, and I don't want others to think that I feel that I know it all. Which leads to my next reason.    2. Unfortunately, I am what some would like to call a "people pleaser" I am a creature of some fears.  I don't like to cause waves, I like everyone to be happy, and I fear that some of the things that will be shared might cause some to get upset,  however I am learning that this is a part of life- and that not all people will agree with me, or the things posted here- they may not even like me and that is okay.  3.  I also have to admit that it does seem a little overwhelming- I have been prompted and prodded to get this started and I feel like I have finally been driven to do so.  

This first post will be a little lengthy in order to give background and to set the stage for my reasons to start this blog.  This is intended to give encouragement, uplift, and to help us find joy in being women, mothers, sisters, a wife, and a daughter.  It is also to help women feel empowered, and find strength to do all that our Father in Heaven requires of His daughters.  I have several daughters of my own and I pray that they will feel the beauty of and the excitement in being a daughter of God.  That they will find value in being a wife, mother and a woman.  I believe that we have been saved to come at such a time as this, because the Lord needs us to be here now.  He needs us to be strong, and to stand up for what is right.  I hope and pray that as I share my personal thoughts, and as we learn about other strong, and valiant women and as I share lessons from our prophets that these will inspire us to do a little better, try a little harder.  I hope that it will help us Have Understanding Be Believing and Live Extraodinary!  It will help us HUBBLE!  


WHY HUBBLE???

Well,...... Here goes my story.  Several years ago I went on a trip to Washington DC with a couple of my girlfriends.  It was a time in my life when I was really struggling.  I wasn't sure that being a "mom" was all that I was meant to do- that somehow I had lost my way and that I was meant to do so much more in this life than all of the mundane tasks of a wife and mother.  In my mind this was such a contradiction because as you may have read, being a mother is all I ever wanted to do.  I didn't expect to feel overwhelmed, tired, unappreciated, and over-worked.  I didn't expect mother-hood to be so hard.  Along with all of the "mother" trouble I was feeling,  I also felt guilt because of the feelings I had been having.  We were also going through a really tough financial trial.  My husband knew that I was at the very end of my rope- so he sold some of our assets to help me to go "find" myself.  I know that at the time some thought it was the most unwise use of money- of coarse it probably was.  I could have bought food, paid the electric bill etc..... the list could go on and on.  I knew for me that I needed to get away and have time to fill my cup.  I really needed some help from above, and I needed it soon.  It was all getting too much for me.  I admit that going to Washington DC was a little out there, but this is my story- and this is what I needed to do.  I needed to be in this place, at this time, with these women in order for the Lord to speak to me, and He knew that it was vitally important that I was in a place where I could hear Him.  He knew exactly what my needs were.  So, my journey took me east.   


DC is an amazing place rich with history.  I loved every minute of it.  We toured as much as we could, every day from dawn to dusk we were bustling about, taking it all in.  The answer to my questions about my worth and what my purpose in this life actually came in the most unlikely of places.  - The air and space museum.  I know...... how could my answer come there.  It was unexpected for me as well.  We had debated on watching the Hubble 3D IMAX movie, or continue on our tour.  We had been walking around a lot and decided to sit for a movie.  

As I sat and watched the scene play out on the screen before me I was amazed at what I saw.  I have always been fascinated with space.  As a child I watched a movie called "Space Camp" and I thought for sure that one day I would be traveling out there.  I love flying and it seemed like adventure awaited me in the sky.  But, aerospace was not in the cards for me.......  Then, a funny thing happened.... As the movie went on I began seeing through different eyes.  I was not just seeing what the hubble telescope was seeing but I was understanding a little more about what I was seeing.  It was all unexpected, the lessons that would be taught to me in a 43 minute movie would change my life.  I began to "feel" things that have been hard to find words for.  I looked to my friend next to me to see if she were getting the same thing out of this as I was.  She was asleep.  I wanted to say something to her, but because she was resting I was left alone to my thoughts and the inspiration that I was experiencing.  The beautiful images I was seeing I understood to be literal creations of God.  I have always know that God created the universe, a truth that I have never questioned.  I watched as the narrator told of a star being "born", and others that had run their coarse and were dying.  It was then that I was overwhelmed with a knowledge that our Heavenly Father has done all of this for us...... for me.  He created all of these things for a little, insignificant person like me.  ALL that He does and all that He as ever done is for His children.  Space is His playground, a place where He gets to use imagination and power to create things.  If God can do all of this and has all of this power, why would he care for me.....  when He has so many children, why would I matter to Him?  I had then an experience that I hope I will not forget... I had a voice in my mind tell me that He does all of this because of me- because He loves me .... He loves all His children.  It was then impressed upon me the importance of being a mother.  I am not just a mom so that I can clean up after little people, so that I can help them with their homework and do school projects.  It isn't just so that they have someone there when they need a kiss because they skinned a knee, or even just to listen to them because someone was cruel.  All of those are part of a much bigger picture.  I have been given charge of these special spirits not only to help them become good and honorable adults who can contribute to society.  I am raising them to be so much more than they will ever be able to become in this life time...... I am raising them to become Gods and Goddesses - to one day be able to have space be their playground.  To have them become just like their Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother.  There is so much more than this point in time that we call mortality.  The feelings that I had cannot be expressed accurately in words.  However, I knew then that this one moment in the IMAX would change my life.  It completely changed the way I viewed my role as a mother.  I could feel the weight of my responsibilities as the guardian of the children that Heavenly Father had sent to me.  My job as a mom- that is more important than any  other position I could hold in this life.  

I also felt the need to share my experience, and learn more about the importance of women to our Heavenly father, what I can do to be more bold, and be a tool in His hands.  Since that day I have been compelled to learn more and to start this blog for my daughters, and sisters.  As said before I hope that this will encourage them to endure the hard things we are called to do, because there is a greater purpose.  We are needed!  We have been saved to do things now that only we can do.  So as I begin this journey I pray that I will
Have
Understanding
Be
Believing
Live
Extraordinary!

And that I can encourage my daughters to do the same.  That they will find meaning in their life, and know that it is a privilege to be a woman in these last days.  I will close this with a quote from President Spencer W. Kimball "To be a righteous woman is a glorious thing in any age.  To be a righteous woman during the winding up scenes on this earth, before the second coming of our Savior, is an especially noble calling.  The righteous woman's strength and influence today can be tenfold what it might be in more tranquil times.  She has been placed here to help to enrich, to protect, and to guard the home- which is society's basic and most noble institution.  Other institutions in society may falter and even fail, but the righteous woman can help to save the home, which may be the last and only sanctuary some mortals know in the midst of storm and strife."

We need to Have understanding- why we are here, who we are, our responsibilities, what we can do to make a difference, what's required of us....... the list goes on and on
We need to Be Believing- Believe in our Heavenly Father, Believe in our Savior Jesus Christ, Believe in each other, and Believe in ourselves.
We need to Live Extraordinary!!!  Make a difference- I know we can!!  

So...... I have been nervous for years to start this- here it goes.........